Milton Erickson was the premier hypnotherapist of the 20th century, if not of all time. He knew a thing or two about a lot of things, including resistance. He once told a teaching story involving his father on their farm in Wisconsin. Young Milton observed his father trying to pull a small steer by its […]
A quiet mind is a strong mind. In an age of busy-ness and urgency, of multi-tasking and work overload, it’d be understandable to think that what’s required is a really switched-on mind, or a really busy mind. But, nothing could be farther from the truth! The noisier the mind, the less productive it becomes. This […]
Would you rather be right or happy? In examining this question, road rage can be quite illuminating. Indeed, road rage can make for very entertaining therapy, especially if the person has to drive to reach the counseling office! You see, as a counselor we frequently don’t get to see the issues ‘live’ as it were […]
Cultivating the Art of Deep Work This is a series of short talks on the theme of modern life and work, exploring the challenges of productivity, distraction, prioritisation, deep work and working for wellbeing. We start with productivity and the curse of busyness Part 1: Productivity & the Curse of Busyness If you are like me, […]
It’s always been a bit of a puzzle for me: is perfectionism a good or a bad thing? In my psychology training it was was mostly discussed as a problem as it led to unrealistic goals and standards, stress disorders and often burnout. In fact, I’ve spent a good deal of my professional life helping […]
Not all optimism is healthy. It’s only really helpful if it is grounded in reality. So, today I’m not talking about crazy, wild-eyed Pollyanna optimism. And let me make it abundantly clear, I think positive thinking is positively dangerous! In contrast, today I’m talking about realistic optimism: a faith in the future that accepts the […]
In Part 1 of Thee or Me? I touched on the ethical and moral complexities of this Covid period, particularly the stunning contrast between those acting in altruistic fashion and those acting selfishly. In this second part, let’s explore some of the complexities and ambiguities of being human. The crowning glory of homo sapiens is […]
One of the most interesting consequences of the C-19 Pandemic has been the public displays of both prosocial and antisocial sentiments. Alongside hoarding and profiteering of essential supplies and protective equipment, or acts of flagrant aggression and selfishness, have been many altruistic and creatively kind gestures made to friend and stranger alike. More broadly there […]
I wonder if you’ve ever had this experience. You have a good friend who is depressed. You love them dearly. You’re mystified: You see clearly that they are a wonderful human being. You really esteem them. But they think they are worthless, a burden to others. You tell them how great they are. They are wrong […]
Imagine you’re holding a newborn baby. You’re looking down into its unblinking eyes. You smell that unmistakeable baby freshness. Unless you’re psychologically damaged goods, you’d be having feelings of love, if not awe, for this new human being. What you wouldn’t be doing is withholding your love until the baby did something to warrant it: […]
